Ramblings of an overcrowded mind

Twitter

2009-07-01T11:58:00.001-07:00

Follow me :)
www.twitter.com/WsupCheri

"Time"

2009-05-26T21:51:00.000-07:00

Time, where did you go?
Why did you leave me here alone?

Wait, don't go so fast
I'm missing the moments as they pass

Now I've looked in the mirror and the worlds getting clearer
So wait for me this time

I'm down, I'm down on my knees
I'm begging for all your sympathy
But you, you don't seem to care
You humble people everywhere

Now I've looked in the mirror and the worlds getting clearer
I'll take what you give me. Please know that I'm learning
So wait for me this time

I should've know better
I shouldn't have wasted those days
And afternoons and mornings
I threw them all away

Now this is my time
I'm going to make this moment mine.
I'll take what you give me. Please know that I'm learning
I've looked in the mirror
My world's getting clearer
So wait for me this time

How to install LOVE

2009-05-18T19:21:00.000-07:00

From Deaj's tumblr. Thought I'd share

Tech Support: Hello … how can I help you?

Customer: Well, after much consideration, I’ve decided to install
Love. Can you guide me through the process?

Tech Support: Yes. I can help you. Are you ready to proceed?

Customer: Well, I’m not very technical, but I think I’m ready. What do I do first?

Tech Support: The first step is to open your Heart. Have you
located your Heart?

Customer: Yes, but there are several other programs running now.
Is it okay to install Love while they are running?

Tech Support: What programs are running ?

Customer: Let’s see, I have Past Hurt, Low Self-Esteem, Grudge
and Resentment running right now.

Tech Support: No problem, Love will gradually erase Past Hurt
from your current operating system. It may remain in your permanent
memory but it will no longer disrupt other programs. Love will
eventually override Low Self-Esteem with a module of its own called High
Self-Esteem. However, you have to completely turn off Grudge and
Resentment. Those programs prevent Love from being properly installed.
Can you turn those off ?

Customer: I don’t know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?

Tech Support: With pleasure. Go to your start menu and invoke
Forgiveness. Do this as many times as necessary until Grudge and
Resentment have been completely erased.

Customer: Okay, done! Love has started installing itself. Is that
normal?

Tech Support: Yes, but remember that you have only the base
program. You need to begin connecting to other Hearts in order to get
the upgrades.

Customer: Oops! I have an error message already. It says, “Error
- Program not run on external components.” What should I do?

Tech Support: Don’t worry. It means that the Love program is set
up to run on Internal Hearts, but has not yet been run on your Heart. In
non-technical terms, it simply means you have to Love yourself before
you can Love others.

Customer: So, what should I do?

Tech Support: Pull down Self-Acceptance; then click on the
following files: Forgive-Self; Realize Your Worth; and Acknowledge your
Limitations.

Customer: Okay, done.

Tech Support: Now, copy them to the “My Heart” directory. The
system will overwrite any conflicting files and begin patching faulty
programming. Also, you need to delete Verbose Self-Criticism from all
directories and empty your Recycle Bin to make sure it is completely
gone and never comes back.

Customer: Got it. Hey! My heart is filling up with new files.
Smile is playing on my monitor and Peace and Contentment are copying
themselves all over My Heart. Is this normal?

Tech Support: Sometimes. For others it takes awhile, but
eventually everything gets it at the proper time. So Love is installed
and running. One more thing before we hang up. Love is Freeware. Be sure
to give it and its various modules to everyone you meet. They will in
turn share it with others and return some cool modules back to you.

Customer: Thank you, God.

Lord, heal the broken hearted.

2009-04-08T17:58:00.000-07:00

So LA and SD was fun, I wish I didn't go home. Now we're swarmed by homework again and I'm not ready to face these problems.

Excuses.

2009-03-24T18:34:00.000-07:00

Defend your girlfriend, you bastard. Stop babying the girl you used to like and start paying attention to your girl.

Inspire me

2009-02-26T19:47:00.000-08:00

because I feel like I'm in a freakin' rut

"Love is the same as like except you feel sexier."

2009-02-19T13:24:00.001-08:00

- Judith Viorst
I'm loving her work right now. Her poems make me laugh.

We're graduating in 14.5 weeks :)

Relax your face, stop being a brat.

Little Women by Louisa May Alcott

2009-02-01T22:46:00.000-08:00

"'That boy is a perfect cyclops, isn't he?' said Amy one day, as Laurie clattered by on horseback, with a flourish of his whip as he passed.

'How dare you say so, when he's got both his eyes? And very handsome ones they are, too,' cried Jo, who resented any slighting remarks about her friend.

'I didn't say anything about his eyes, and I don't see why you need fire up when I admire his riding.'

'Oh, my goodness! That little goose means a centaur, and she called him a Cyclops,' exclaimed Jo, with a burst of laughter."

I love Jo, lol

The morals of Americans are messed up on all sorts

2008-12-14T22:03:00.000-08:00

R.I.P. old traditional morals

Sorry if I seem old fashioned and I actually try to OBEY the law instead of intentionally, on purpose breaking laws.

You can't call 99 cents, a dollar.

Team Edward.

2008-11-24T17:16:00.000-08:00

Because vampires are sexier than werewolves.

DILLIGAF?

2008-11-06T20:36:00.000-08:00

Happy days =)

Just working on some more problems and with God's blessing, my soul will finally be at peace again.

Khrizia, Alexis, and I went crazy

2008-10-31T21:26:00.000-07:00

And in that moment, I swear we were infinite

Falling back into old habits...

2008-10-22T21:12:00.000-07:00

In a way, I feel like it's the only way I can deal.
I'm sorry

Forget the creative soul

2008-10-08T23:32:00.000-07:00

Bounded, held down, restricted
And things pass through my mind.
My mouth taped shut, no one hears my thoughts
No one listens
A little voice in a big world
Chained and shackled
Tied hands, arms, and feet

And sometimes I just want to break free.

Christmas 2008

2008-10-07T22:50:00.001-07:00

First Scrooge meeting was today. I feel Christmas air stirring. The stress of Hell Week torturing my back. Running around, memorizing songs and dance steps. Yet, this is my favorite part of the year. I feel happy and that's what I want.

Thanks for apologizing. I've been feeling it for a while but my role of being a good girlfriend is to be supportive of your extra curricular activities. I want you to be happy.

ECON SUCKS

A machine can't work with missing parts.

2008-10-02T14:20:00.000-07:00

Thanks bestfriend, I needed that talk.

Talk it over, figure out what's wrong. The tension will add up and one day, it'll all blow over. You need to let it go.

So everyone at school is obsessed with Yu-gi-oh cards right now, very interesting.

Grad band practice at Keoni's tomorrow

Christian Rock Concert in Calistoga on Saturday. YAY NEWBOYS!

Accepting.

2008-09-21T01:00:00.000-07:00

Finally, it feels like the feud is over. I don't know what happened but we're getting along and I'm glad because one day, it'll be my wedding and I'll want her there. The three of us are childhood and in a way, we bring out each others' flaws but we also bring out the best in each other. They're the sisters that are my age and it feels awesome that we're comfortable with each other.

Then it makes me think about my wedding that will happen one day...

Amidst the darkness, she would find hope.

2008-09-19T20:28:00.000-07:00

If you know Digimon and the characters in which this quote relates to, this would be as an awesome a quote to you as it is to me.

cut short

2008-09-17T20:28:00.000-07:00

Stuck in the corner,
Nowhere to turn.
Imagination crushed,
Creativity stifled,
Independence lost,
Individuality taken away.
There's nothing left of her now.

And that was all that she was,
All that she had.
She wasn't the "athlete,"
Nor the "star student,"
Not even the "musician."
Now she's a nobody.
She had to get out of this place.
But all she could do was
Cry herself to sleep.

Knowing her nightmare would be reality again the next day

And sometimes I feel used...

2008-08-22T22:31:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, I want to be heard. I want to be listened to.

I wish you'd just take time to hear me...

I need to find a muse...

2008-08-02T22:33:00.000-07:00

I remember before I was always angry. So I'd always write and it was GOOD STUFF. I look back at my old work and I'm like "wow, that was me?" Now I write and it's just not there anymore. I love writing but I can't find anything that inspires me.

Life sucks... and then you die

2008-07-28T19:43:00.000-07:00

So it's been a while... okay so it's been a bit longer.

I can't wait until next week. "Fuge," just the name reminds me of last year. I can't wait to sit by the lake, wade in, skip rocks, play basketball barefoot, church group devotions, and my favorite: quiet time. I love Jenness Park, I feel at peace. Even when I'm outside doing my quiet time while half the groups are doing rec in front of me. Sometimes, I would finish early and be able to just talk to Jon or Robert and Kelly. When I'm with the youth, it's like "this is my family" and we see each other grow up and change. I can't wait

Ephesians 2:4-5... Inertia

2008-06-23T17:22:00.000-07:00

The whole week at Ecuador was, like Tyler says, a continuous slap in the face from God about how selfish we are, especially here in America. In Jazmin's group, there was a lady who had barely anything, yet she fed them everyday for lunch. In my group, the toilets didn't even have water in them. Whenever they'd offer us food, no matter how disgusting it was, we had to accept it. Why? Because that's all they'd have for the day and not accepting it means that we're saying we're too good for whatever they give. It's the ultimate time for them to say, "How dare you think you're better than me?!" When I think about it, they're so generous to their guests while we avoid even asking if they want food. One girl (after accepting Jesus as her Savior) gave her rosary to me and I was touched. It was fake gold and fading but it probably meant a lot to her family, that was their religion. As for me, I spent months begging my mom for a cross made out of white gold just so it won't fade. The girl asked me to put it on and I was soooo hesitant because I have never worn a rosary before... but with the reminder of accepting whatever they give us, I put it on for her.

It was more than just what they offered. Everyday, the kids would walk to and from school by themselves, many of them younger than 10. I remember asking the kids "Cuantos anos tienes?" (How many years do you have?) and most of them would reply "nueve." Occasionally they would say "cuatro" but they usually had brothers or sisters to take them home. I remember this one conversation with a little girl named Natalie:

me: Donde esta tu madre? (Where is your mother?)
Natalie: En mi casa (In my house)
me: Tu padre? (Your father?)
Natalie: No tengo (I don't have)
me: No tiene? (You don't have?)
Natalie: *nods*

That was probably the worse question I could've asked. I felt so guilty but she looked like it was normal to her. As I hugged her and held her close, I looked up at the sky and said the only thing that could come to my mind, "Jesus es tu padre. Jesus te ama." She nodded. She was such an adorable girl, you could tell she was the "cute but not popular" girl. When I told my mom the conversation when I got home, my mom said "One day, she'll remember she doesn't have a father and she'll think she can have kids and they won't need one." As that ran through my mind, I thought of how sad that is. These kids seemed so eager to meet us and no matter what we did, even if most of us didn't understand or speak their language, they loved us. They were just happy that we were there and they loved us. I remember on the 3rd day, I picked up my favorite one, Janet, and she said to me "Te quiero mucho." (I love you so much)

Plus the complaining inside the camp made us seem more selfish than ever. Before we'd leave at 10am and after we'd come back at 4pm, there was always something wrong. The schedule was super tiring, 6am-11pm of just constant movement. Being at 6000 feet above sea level took a toll on how we'd breathe. One shower wouldn't work or there would be no hot water. Some girl accidentally took Catt's towel and even though she had another one, it was just a pain knowing someone was using the towel you wiped your butt with. Catt and I were at bad terms at the beginning of the trip because of our ongoing fight. The food was always the same for breakfast. Sometimes Emma would annoy me but I chose to be an Ate and take care of her because she reminds me so much of how bad my health was when I was a kid. I was still butthurt about my Barkada not being there. Inertia felt so separated at times. There was technical problems... but our problems are so minor. We're just so used to everything working OUR way.

On the bright side, Catt and I had an hour talk alone about our fight. We actually got a lot solved. Even though there's still problems, we both have to admit... we're so alike that we annoy each other. We do the EXACT same things that piss each other off. People say the EXACT same things about us. Plus we found out there's backstabbers that are playing both sides. Our conclusion was just to talk to each other about it, instead of venting to other people. Because when you hear things through the grapevine, even if it just went through one person, it can be so much different than the truth.

Ecuador, here we go!

2008-06-12T10:37:00.000-07:00

Can't believe we're leaving tonight... or tomorrow morning... however you want to put it. I'm so numb whenever I'm leaving for a trip haha. Still packing too.

I can't wait though, I'm excited. Get to have VBS with little Ecuadorian children and build schoolhouses or other stuff for them. I've already figured out that evangelism is not my spiritual gift... neither is speaking my mind but maybe missionary work is? I guess that's what I'll be learning this trip.

I wish my Landichos were going -_- can't believe Jeremy went to the hospital AGAIN for like the 3rd or 4th time within the past year? Since November, I guess. I keep telling him to watch himself. And then his BROTHER, my fave, needs surgery on his knee?! Both my Landichos can't go =( It's really upsetting but I doubt Jeremy can make it with his lung and Tim can't do much with his knee. Honestly, they're so much like my brothers and best friends now and I only met them last year? Amazing... oh CRAP! just realized I won't be here for mine and fave's first year anni of being friends =( ahhh poo. I gotta myspace him now haha

As we go on, we remember all the times we spent together...

2008-05-31T09:50:00.000-07:00

The first HCCP senior class is graduating today. I was watching their rehearsal and when they got off stage, I hugged Kuya Kevin and I started to tear up and almost cry... Even though I've been to school with them for only a year, I've known a lot of them for years. I hugged Sterling for one of the first times in my life but I remember he and I go back to crib days... I remember when he stole my baby bottle haha. Kuya Daniel and I go back to diaper days. I even hugged Kriztian but I'm seriously going to miss all of them... I wonder how today will go.